Get Out The Group Chat

Get Out The Group Chat

January 02, 2024 Shavonia Lewis & Tanzania Black Season 1 Episode 1
Get Out The Group Chat
Get Out The Group Chat
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Get Out The Group Chat
Get Out The Group Chat
Jan 02, 2024 Season 1 Episode 1
Shavonia Lewis & Tanzania Black

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You have now been added to our Group Chat! Join our group chat for motivation to take that well-deserved vacation, achieve your goals, and becoming a better friend. In 2024, we're stepping out of the group chat and embracing everything God has in store for us! 🎙️✨

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Follow Black Friends Forever: @blackfriendsforever
Follow Shay: @shavonia_marie
Follow Tanzania: @theniablack

To support the work of Black Friends Forever, donate via Cashapp: $blackfriendsforever or a monthly subscription https://www.buzzsprout.com/2295163/supporters/new

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Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/moire/new-life (https://click.pstmrk.it/3s/uppbeat.io%2Ft%2Fmoire%2Fnew-life/vZub/Zq6yAQ/AQ/74ea54e8-4ea3-498b-a4eb-796286f9e4e7/4/qc1qvBx_nI)
License code: 4LNHLW6CL9FJGMWN

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Show Notes Transcript

Send us a Text Message.

You have now been added to our Group Chat! Join our group chat for motivation to take that well-deserved vacation, achieve your goals, and becoming a better friend. In 2024, we're stepping out of the group chat and embracing everything God has in store for us! 🎙️✨

Support the Show.

Instagram
Follow Black Friends Forever: @blackfriendsforever
Follow Shay: @shavonia_marie
Follow Tanzania: @theniablack

To support the work of Black Friends Forever, donate via Cashapp: $blackfriendsforever or a monthly subscription https://www.buzzsprout.com/2295163/supporters/new

To advertise with us or if you want to shout your bestie out email blackfriendsforeverms@gmail.com

Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/moire/new-life (https://click.pstmrk.it/3s/uppbeat.io%2Ft%2Fmoire%2Fnew-life/vZub/Zq6yAQ/AQ/74ea54e8-4ea3-498b-a4eb-796286f9e4e7/4/qc1qvBx_nI)
License code: 4LNHLW6CL9FJGMWN

1, 2, 3, 4, get your friends about the group chat, group chat, group chat. Wave your passport  in the air, the  devil, he don't like it. Stomp that devil, stomp that devil. Oh, well,  Oh, well. 

I'm Nia  Black. My name is Shavonia Marie. And we're your hosts of Get Out the Group Chat Podcast. We are so excited because we are on this new venture doing this podcast. Out here in this world trying to help the people with what Shay friendship get everything y'all talk about in the group chat.

We're going to be talking about pulling it out. Like, like Jesus took you out of the pits of hell. We're going to be  taking you out of the group chat. Everything trips, um, ideas. We're doing all of that. And we're doing that because what we've learned is that. Growth happens best in community, and we want you in community.

Okay, we don't want you to be out here not having any friends. We want you to be able to keep the friends, maintain, have good friendships, be able to recognize a good friend, knowing this is not a good friend. We're doing all that, so we're here to help you with that. Everything because we want to see you grow.

Personally, I've grown a lot with all the friends I've had, including Miss Shavonia Lewis over here. She's absolutely amazing. I've known her, I feel like, almost a decade at this point. And so, it's really weird, you know, well, I think I've told you this a couple times, but I knew her brother, SteveVon Lewis.

He's amazing. Um, and I was supposed to go on this mission trip and I guess he told Shay about it and she like gave money to it. And I remember thinking, she's going to be my friend.  I don't know her. I have never met her, but she is going to be my friend. Yes.  We're here. We're here. We're here  and now we're getting out of the group chat  with the podcast.

She, she got this idea out the group chat. It took, took a little time. There's power in the group chat. She got it out. So sometimes there's mess in the group chat. That's true. And you know, it's mess God needs to deliver us from. But sometimes there's a blessing in the group chat, right? That's why our first topic we're going to talk about is get out the group chat.

We're getting out, we're getting out of the group chat. So. A lot of people, including us, struggle with getting the ideas, getting the dreams, getting the trip. Mmm. That's a trip. So, so she's kind of, you know, hitting on a little something right now because she know, um, I missed the trip this year to Paris.

Yeah, yeah. I didn't get to go to Paris. Now that was my fault. That was my fault. That was my fault. Um, but this is the thing. It's really like, So I started off good. I had to save the dance, y'all. Good intentions. Good intentions. Follow through. Um, yeah. That's what it is. My, my follow through. Just in general though.

Actually, it's kind of even not just the truth now that we think about it. Ha!  In general. Yeah, my follow through. I don't know. I'm, I I don't know why. I don't know what, like getting stuck. I think it's, it is time. It's procrastination. Yeah. That's what it is. It's procrastination because I do,  I don't know why though.

And I think, I think it's because doing trips, doing events, all the things showing up for people to ring the person to plan requires intentionality. Yeah. You don't get intentionality on a whim. Intentionality looks like I have seven days in a week. Yeah. Two days this week I'm gonna spend 30 minutes to make sure.

Yes. She's that type of type of friend. Absolutely. manage your time. Not, I'm not. I'm going to be crazy and I'll be all over the place and you can tell what I have not done today because I'll be all over the place. Yeah, I'm, I'm more of a put it out there. Catch me another month or two. I'm going to put something else out there.

Catch me another three months. You know what I mean? So I'm one of those and it doesn't work for me. You can't do that in your 30s. If you're going to have successful friendships in your 30s, you got to give the people the details. You got to let them know. And I didn't give the people the details. And so last year, um, I went to Paris and my good friend did not make it.

I'm gonna give the deets. But I'm this person too, like where my, all my family went. And so I'm kind of like, ah, you know, Shay is, Shay is one of those people that are like, as long as I got my family? I don't need know body else. Oh, she's grown. Yeah. She's realized, you know, cause you need family.

Family is important. They are absolutely a priority. Uh, but God place friends. He calls himself a friend, but you went to my 30th. That was five years ago. Five. That was a good plan trip though. Everything was, everything was great. And we're going to have to show you on price is right.  Tanzania. Rupert is on here.

You are.  Wow. Here she go. Look.  Look at  her! Wow! She from Elgin I was on the Price is Right. I didn't get the Price is Right, though. Yeah, she, she was horrible, y'all. We definitely have to show that clip. Yeah, we're gonna have to show that. But no, so we've had good trips. Yeah, yeah. Um, so I guess for you, that you would consider that one of your successful trips.

Yes, that was, that was a good one. It was five years ago, though. It was five years ago, but uh  Honestly, it was probably one of my most favorite ever. I mean, we stayed in a hotel and right across the street. I remember us in a gas station.  When I tell you that Mexican food was amazing, way better than Texas. 

Way better than Houston, Texas. That, it was just like, you're ever in a moment where it's just like, I am supposed to be here. Like, I was in LA. I think we went like every morning or something. We was going. I was in LA like. Remember I was trying to find a job? Yes! I was like, I think your brother had a friend or something.

I was just like, I was really considering staying. I was not, I was not trying to go home. Yeah, that was a good one. LA was an amazing trip. So, that's one of the things we got out of the group chat. So that's one of my successes. What, what's something you were successful getting out of the group chat well, if you know anything about me, um, if you'd like to go to my Instagram page, you can follow me at The Nia Black.

What you'll see on my page is that I just believe, no, I truly believe that life sucks. Yeah. And life is hard and life is difficult. And you can just.  The people be going through the stuff and we be having trauma drama and maybe a llama. I don't know  It'd be a lot going on and so because of that I feel like we need to take advantage of the Opportunities and the time where we can have a good time And so for me it started some years ago when the first black panther movie came out I don't know why I was It.

The movie for me represented like  all things, all things royalty, black Lives Matter. Just being proud about who you are, and I don't know the trailer. The trailer must have been trailering because  at that point I hadn't even seen the movie, but I was fully convinced we went to see the movie in African attire.

I remember we were. You had a whole weekend. It was a weekend. We went to the movies that Friday night in our African attire. I think the next day was a dinner, like a royal dinner. Like the whole, I put the whole meal, dessert, the whole night, y'all. Cause I really just wanted my friends to feel like Kings and Queens.

Cause that's just how I view them. So it started, I'm the type of person  We're going to dress up for the movies when the last Wakanda came out, we were in all white right. We were prepping for that for three months. Yeah. Do you hear me? Well, it's in the details. My, my good friend, Joseph, when I tell you, he was pulling everything out of something, hairstyles, outfits, creating things even to the last second and last moment.

Um, so yeah,  typically what I plan  goes to plan. I think me,  Okay. I want things to go a specific way and I love the idea of everybody that I love being there. So what happens?  When somebody doesn't show up, you know what happens,  you know what happens. I think you gotta make it feel some type of way.  And the way is hurt. 

The way is sad. And it's because I feel like, especially when you give somebody an ample amount of time to be there. And they don't show up or you let somebody know like all  this time ahead of time and you put all the things in place to make sure that they're successful. It just hurts when they don't show up because I just, I have this grand vision.

I want to see everybody there. Yeah. I want all my friends there. And I think I'm the opposite a little bit, just a little. I like, I don't think You be, you be content. Yeah, yeah, that's what it is. You more content with like, I'm going to just be happy with who's there. Yeah, I And I love that for you. Yeah, I don't, but I  2024.

I have been this year. Just been like, okay, they say they can't make it right. Focus my attention on the 8 that did. Yeah. Yeah. Cause sometimes we dismiss the people who do. Right. That's wrong. That's disrespectful. Or like, that's not cool on my part to like not appreciate. The people who, who did show up, who did put in their money to cover all these dress ups. 

Shorty over here. What did you get? Did you drive or did you fly here for it? Yep. Let me tell you something. Shay is a real friend. You know how people can be a friend and they maybe show up in one way, but they still a good friend in that one way. Shay is a good friend in all the way. Now if I'm down and out crying,  that's her weakness.

I'm not good. Yeah. Don't cry.  Don't cry, but, um, I can help you with that. She said no bad news. Yeah, no bad news.  That's hilarious. Literally. But yeah, I think I'm the opposite I'm just content. Yeah. Who comes, who goes, you don't know. So, so if you're the friend that's planning, I encourage you. Yes. I encourage you to focus on who does come.

Now, nobody's ever coming. Then you might need to get out that group chat. Get out that one. Make you a new one.  And I mean never. I don't mean like you playing one event and then no one shows up. Cause you gotta give a little bit of grace.  But if you had three parties, three events, three dinners, three dates, three hangouts, and no one showed up.

Probably need a new friend group. So I'll give  grace. And then just for those who do show up, who do care, who, who do give you that energy, make sure you show them a lot of love because they deserve it. So let me just say this to all of my friends who showed up to every one of you that  have consistently showed up for me, showing up to the events and showed up to the things.

I appreciate you. Flowers.  I thank you for showing me love in that way. Show me that I mean something to you because not everybody has it. So thank you. And I love all of you. All right. So is there anything this year in 2024 that you need to get out of the group chat? What do I need to get out of the group chat in 2024?

I need to get, I have this one friend every single week we talk about going to work out.  And all it is is a text message.  So that ain't getting out the group chat. That ain't getting in the group. I got a whole web to be in. And I told her I need to lose 17 pounds. It's in the group. The group chat says we're going to work out on Monday.

It's something about a Sunday. So I'll be like the next day. She's like okay the next day. And then I have this excuse, well you ain't texted the night before so I can't confirm that you'll be here for the workout.  So in this year I'm going to get the workout out  of the group chat. So I have to give it up.

When we get into season two, y'all gonna be like, what was the meal plan? Right. What was the workout? I'm about to join y'all.  I'm about to join y'all on that one. 2024, I'm picking y'all. I got you. Please don't put the podcast on the news, though. Okay, okay, I'm gonna let you know. I'm gonna join y'all.

Virtually, probably, but I'm gonna join y'all, you know. But yeah, for me, uh, my 2024 getting out the group chat would be Um, probably acting. I've been talking about that for years, so  now we have it on. We've recorded it. We have the audio visuals. We're not cutting that. Shay said in 2024, she is going to be pursuing her acting career.

And it's a career. Let's, let's not make it seem like I just want to gig at a commercial or I just want to be an extra in the background. It's an acting career, right? And so that's what I'm gonna get. We're believing God that he would give you the confidence. He's giving you the faith to walk into that thing.

Because that's who you are. I'm going to tell you.  This was a few years ago. Shay did this monologue. Don't show that. Don't show that. Shay. We ain't got no. I don't even know if we have to do that. Shay just recorded of the help. I promise you. Somebody just in the comments. If we get enough comments of people saying, do it.

She got this monologue from the help. Roger Shorty is from New York. I hate you. I hate you. But the way she turned on that,  and I don't know  what you've been through,  but God is going to bring you out of the way, that ain't even a, that ain't even a word to me. And she is, she absolutely, I was in here,  and here we are almost eight years later, and you are not walking into that thing.

So in 2024, she's going to be doing some acting. Yes. Shameless plug. You need to also, you know, go to some other videos on our YouTube channel or go to our YouTube channel. We have a mini series called  Fly on the Wall. Fly on the Wall. And so you'll be able to see, um, Shay acting. For me, it's the script writing.

I'll be doing the acting with her. I am not trying to be an actress. She just like, she just, I just wanna write it behind the scenes. I wanna be, I wanna help produce it, create it, write the storylines, that whole so thing. So go do it. It is super funny, super crazy. It's kind of getting into, you know, if certain situations in the Bible Yeah.

If you could be fly on the wall, see like what was the, what happened when they went back to the house kind of thing. Or  it's great. So you need to go ahead and wash that. Yeah. Check that out. Yeah. So excited. Yes, I am sure. So you don't know this, but on every single episode.  We are going to have this part where we share with you just crazy friendship stories.

Okay. And so we're going to start with the first one.  I'll let Shay read it. So  the day I was informed that my presence wasn't necessary for the annual Christmas party. After I had spent what little money I had made that year into presents for the friends that I thought were supportive of me. I still have the presents.

I think the saddest part of this story is that she still has the present. Yes. So even though either she wasn't invited or they didn't yet, I'm assuming she was not invited to the Christmas party or they didn't tell her about it. But even after that moment,  Nobody showed up to get their present. Right. So that means they really weren't friends.

You weren't friends anyway. So it makes me think,  but  sometimes people are unaware of the fact that these folks not your friends. And I think people don't know the difference between friends and associates too. Cause maybe they're just associates. Maybe you need to get out of that group chat of thinking they're just friends and put them in the associate.

That way you don't have to burnt you know what I mean? And then you know what? Sometimes I realize that people just be telling. Part of the story. They really just be telling part of the story.  What'd you do to these people? Maybe she wasn't invited  to the annual Christmas party. 

But I mean, you guys, you got a point, but I'm just saying for her sake, I would say get out there and make you, if you out there.  If you're listening, if you remember you wrote this in a little reddit group. Get out that group chat because maybe they're just associates and not friends. Um, that's why we say, um, what we learned was growth happens best in communities is.

Because you have to do community with these people. And if you're not,  and they're just associates, you're not doing community with them. You're not growing. You need friends. You need friends to help see the best and the worst in you to help you to grow and to become. Right. And so I think you should probably check what was the friendship like before we get to, we got to the Christmas party.

Right. People, I mean, not saying people don't just act a fool in a moment, but something. Something had to trigger this or cause it. So reevaluate who you're surrounded by, who's in your space, who's speaking into your life. Because if you really truly pay attention to those things, you don't know who you need to be in a group chat with and who you need to get out of the group chat with.

Right. Okay. Yeah. So that is our first episode. We're so super excited right? Yes. Yes. Yes. We need you guys to go ahead and subscribe, like, and comment. This is our first episode y'all. You know how YouTube do. We ain't trying to have no 50 views. Okay. So I need you to share this with five people. And when you're done sharing it with five people, I need you to come back to the comments and say, I shared it to my people because we want to help the people.

Yes. We want you to have some friends. We want you to be, you know, better in 2024. It's more just, you need to get your health right. Yes. Your wealth right. Yes. Your mental health. You need to get your life, but that includes friends and you need friends for accountability. You need friends for your growth.

So share this with five people. Okay. Let us know in the comments, do all the things and we will see you guys next week.  Get out the group chat. Period boo.  And I work like a dog, day and night,  living off a coffee from a pot none of you want to touch.  So excuse me,  if I have to use the restroom a few times a day.