In this episode, we explore the challenges of being both a banker and a best friend, featuring Nikia Sharif alongside Tanzania Black and Shavonia Marie. Through personal stories, we discuss the balance of communication, setting expectations, and the wisdom in deciding when to lend money, emphasizing the blend of practical and spiritual advice. The conversation highlights the true currency of friendship, stressing the importance of generosity, support, and the deeper value of relationships beyond financial transactions. If you've ever felt tested by financial tensions in your friendships, tune in for reflections on grace, healing, and abundance within relationships, and connect with us on socials to enrich your friendships beyond monetary value.
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Follow Nikia Sharif: @nikiasharif
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Follow Black Friends Forever: @blackfriendsforever
Follow Shay: @shavonia_marie
Follow Tanzania: @theniablack
To support the work of Black Friends Forever, donate via Cashapp: $blackfriendsforever or a monthly subscription https://www.buzzsprout.com/2295163/supporters/new
To advertise with us or if you want to shout your bestie out email blackfriendsforeverms@gmail.com
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/moire/new-life (https://click.pstmrk.it/3s/uppbeat.io%2Ft%2Fmoire%2Fnew-life/vZub/Zq6yAQ/AQ/74ea54e8-4ea3-498b-a4eb-796286f9e4e7/4/qc1qvBx_nI)
License code: 4LNHLW6CL9FJGMWN
In this episode, we explore the challenges of being both a banker and a best friend, featuring Nikia Sharif alongside Tanzania Black and Shavonia Marie. Through personal stories, we discuss the balance of communication, setting expectations, and the wisdom in deciding when to lend money, emphasizing the blend of practical and spiritual advice. The conversation highlights the true currency of friendship, stressing the importance of generosity, support, and the deeper value of relationships beyond financial transactions. If you've ever felt tested by financial tensions in your friendships, tune in for reflections on grace, healing, and abundance within relationships, and connect with us on socials to enrich your friendships beyond monetary value.
Instagram
Follow Nikia Sharif: @nikiasharif
Instagram
Follow Black Friends Forever: @blackfriendsforever
Follow Shay: @shavonia_marie
Follow Tanzania: @theniablack
To support the work of Black Friends Forever, donate via Cashapp: $blackfriendsforever or a monthly subscription https://www.buzzsprout.com/2295163/supporters/new
To advertise with us or if you want to shout your bestie out email blackfriendsforeverms@gmail.com
Music from #Uppbeat (free for Creators!):
https://uppbeat.io/t/moire/new-life (https://click.pstmrk.it/3s/uppbeat.io%2Ft%2Fmoire%2Fnew-life/vZub/Zq6yAQ/AQ/74ea54e8-4ea3-498b-a4eb-796286f9e4e7/4/qc1qvBx_nI)
License code: 4LNHLW6CL9FJGMWN
One, two, three, four. Get your friends about the group chat.
Speaker 3:Group chat group chat when your past was in the air, air, air.
Speaker 2:The devil, he don't like it Stump that devil, stump that devil, oh well, oh well.
Speaker 1:And we're back with another episode of Get Out the Group Chat. I am Tanzania Black.
Speaker 3:I am Shavonna Marie and we have our wonderful, magnificent Nikea Sharif in the building. She's back, like she never left.
Speaker 1:Back and back like she never left. So we're excited to have her on for this episode because we're going to help some people today. We're going to give you some tips, some, some tricks, some things on how to navigate money and friendships. All right, but before we get there, we gotta play our game. Should I tell her about her game all?
Speaker 3:right. So we're gonna get into our game. Who knows their bestie? So, nikea, you got a phone, a friend right now, and that friend has to at least get two of the questions right so you can be entered into our BFF award at the end of the season.
Speaker 2:Yes.
Speaker 3:So get the calling, get the calling, okay, let's see all these friends. Wow what bestie.
Speaker 2:Are you calling Just so many?
Speaker 3:friends to look through Okay.
Speaker 2:I got one.
Speaker 3:Okay, you got one.
Speaker 2:All right, it's my sister.
Speaker 3:Okay, bestie sister, sister Alrighty, let's see if she answers yeah.
Speaker 2:Let's see. I believe in you. I believe there we go.
Speaker 3:The sister answered Okay, sister answered, hey, sister, hi, hey. So we got you, we got Nikea and you on the podcast. Get out the group chat podcast and we're playing a game who knows their bestie? So I'm going to ask you three questions. You just got to get two right so she can win one of the awards. All right, okay, all right. So first question is what is nikea's favorite color? I was going to say purple. Oh, ding, ding, ding, ding ding. It's Nikea or purple.
Speaker 2:No, you didn't hear that. She said it at the same time. She had the Holy Ghost up there. I was about to send her help.
Speaker 3:I was the oh you were the. Okay, purple is her favorite color, all right. What is Nikea's favorite food? You know the name Carcass. Oh, all righty. And the last question is was nikea mean or nice? As a kid she was mean, all righty you're the first person to get it right so far that's good, okay.
Speaker 1:Um, what does nikea desire to do with her career, her end goal?
Speaker 3:that's a good question, guess um, she won.
Speaker 1:I feel like this may not be it, but have an orphan.
Speaker 2:That is one of them that I don't talk about as much oh okay, sister came in to own my own practice.
Speaker 3:Oh, okay but it still happened with the kids in a sense right, yeah, okay good job, jazzy. Thank you, watch the podcast okay bye-bye all right, okay, well, thank you so much, nakia, for playing the game. You got three out of three right four ish, three ish right all right y'all.
Speaker 1:So let's go ahead and get into today's episode. Monies and friends, do they mix or not? All right, um. So we got a good friend like here, um, because you know we can be very honest, she is the money lender she is she is the little private bank right um she be collecting them coins and she, you know, may not be the best with managing, but she'd be the best. We get it.
Speaker 2:Y'all need to give me some tips.
Speaker 1:You know how to refill after she's loosed it up she'd be working hard.
Speaker 2:Give me some tips in the comments on how to manage money better, because your girl is slipping.
Speaker 1:So I personally have experienced one of the benefits of being a your friend is having that financial help when you know sis is going through, yes. So first of all thank you for that, for being that type of friend, that allows us to be like nikea, can you please help me out, especially when I had quit my teaching job and I had no you know way out. I appreciate you. Especially my husband shout out to you babe but nikea also for being there, you know being that help so what is that?
Speaker 1:like for you. You know um. Do you feel like you're the friend that people come to for help? Yes, yes. And how do you feel being?
Speaker 2:that friend Honestly. Most of the time I feel like it's a blessing because like. God blessed me with to be financially like stable. I'm still working on a stable part, but it's honestly a blessing.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, so that's that's not good, so does it ever irritate you?
Speaker 3:It depends, it depends on the season, it depends on the person, the person yes, so if somebody's coming to you like a bunch of times and you're like yeah, like. That's where the irritation probably comes from yeah, yeah, go ahead.
Speaker 2:Well, I do have a particular friend, like where it was. I was noticing that there was consistency in like this time of this mom. She gonna ask for a specific amount. I'm just like huh, am I being an enabler, or?
Speaker 3:you know what I mean. So like, so you don't wanna you don't wanna enable a?
Speaker 2:person even though you have it. You're like okay, god let's show you how to get.
Speaker 1:So do you feel like, outside of that time of the month that she was, that person was asking you for the money? Were they your friend or being friendly or like communicating with you outside of those days? Or was it just like? We hear from each other again when that time of the month comes.
Speaker 3:No, actually this was a distant friend, so we really didn't have a consistent communication yeah, yeah I don't know about that one, because I've have, you know, when I was in my seasons of the given um, I think I've had people to ask for help and I think I got irritated. I think, because when it's like consistent, yeah, and then we don't talk, that makes it a little weird when we don't necessarily have a live relationship, but you feel it's live enough for you to consistently ask for money on the same time of the month.
Speaker 3:That can be a little interesting so how did you are you still in that? Or how did you get out of that group chat? You know what? I don't think you got out of that. I just what messing.
Speaker 2:I just what did I do? Honestly, I just said no, oh okay, like I didn't have it, gotcha, and a part of me feels like I should have just communicated like hey, this is yeah, like I feel like this is getting a little bit out of here consistent and I feel like like let's have a conversation on how to obtain not obtain wealth. I haven't reached there yet, but let's have a conversation on how to manage your finances more but you don't like confrontation, do you?
Speaker 2:I don't prefer it, yeah, but if I have to, yeah. I used to be really really bad with it, like I used to hide away from confrontation, but I'm getting better over the years so when you said, hey, I don't got it, that person just stopped asking completely.
Speaker 3:Yeah, oh, that's good, Wow yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, so that's a tip. Just tell them you ain't got it, then they'll figure it out.
Speaker 2:I would encourage you guys to have a conversation, just making sure that. I mean, because the reality is like maybe you don't have it or maybe you want to, you know not enable them, but it's important for you to communicate that yeah. Because they you know, if you're friends, you should be able to communicate that.
Speaker 3:But, like you said, this person is distant too though. At the end of the day, if you're distant, I mean I get the friendship, but I feel like if we have grown apart a little bit, I'm probably not going gonna lend it out like that to you. I'm not gonna lie yeah and one go ahead.
Speaker 2:Sorry. One thing that I've been challenged with is just like praying and asking the lord like okay because, sometimes people are like in very hard seasons of their lives and so like making sure that you're just praying and asking the lord, because he knows, you know, he knows if yeah he knows the nature of the situation.
Speaker 1:How do you go about determining how much you're going to give monthly? Is it in your budget to give it out? Did you ask the Lord, like I know I'm going to give this amount, or are you just kind of doing it on a whim each month?
Speaker 2:I do it on a whim. I literally like, if I receive a text message saying I need this certain amount of money, I'll just send it like it's just okay at this point, let me send a text real quick. Drop me a fifty dollars. My bad, yeah, but no, that's, I don't be budgeting out okay so go ahead.
Speaker 3:So now, and I know because you got a surplus a little bit, so do you. But do you think you need to probably start like because, you want a family someday. So to you know what I mean. Obviously, you probably about to get married. Shout out to my boy but no, I'm just like, but you need to save up for that and stuff like that. So it was like should you start maybe now?
Speaker 2:Definitely Okay, and I think that I mean budgeting like I need to start just managing that like in its entirety, as a whole, as a whole right, so like I suck at it so anybody trying to get comments, uh, let us know if you're a budget or a financial person.
Speaker 3:Help my girl out all right.
Speaker 1:So, outside of the the um circumstance that you mentioned, have you ever had like a situation where it just like it got bad with you, like loaning money to someone, or you found out maybe they were using you or you know whatever?
Speaker 2:I did have a situation where I had an individual that was um living with me um for some time and so um the whole situation, it wasn't primarily money but it was secondary, I guess you can say that. So, primarily, I had given this person like a certain amount of time to, you know, pay back, well, not pay back, but just like, reside with me, okay, and I felt like there was a lack of respect in regards to making sure that they abide by that time frame that I gave them.
Speaker 2:And so there were some times where I was requesting just a partial rent, that I saw this individual like buying things and I had a conversation like hey, you're buying stuff, but I need you know. So that kind of caused a lot of issues gotcha. So uh yeah, we had to have a lot of conversations, therapy oh, that's good.
Speaker 3:At least y'all all of the above, so you cared about the relationship enough, though, to actually want to seek help though oh, yeah, that's what.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's definitely.
Speaker 1:That's the cool part about it, because most now, most people cut them out, cut them out, cut out the group chat.
Speaker 3:I don't want you know what I mean. It's like for y'all to seek that's.
Speaker 2:That's a totally different yeah we didn't even recognize the season that we came out of we went back like we never left okay, shout out.
Speaker 1:So we talked about like the negative experience. But I'm sure that I feel like you have like a gift of giving, like a gift of generosity, like they kind of just something I kind of put in when he was creating nikea. Do you have like a positive experience? It doesn't necessarily have to even be a friend, but where you were able to give to someone and you saw the impact of that gift?
Speaker 3:She said let the story give her something, or Shay. Or Shay I'm trying to think of I do have one.
Speaker 2:You have one one. Well, it's not monetary, but it's just like allowing people to stay with me and just giving people their time so I think that like seeing how they transform after they get established and get you know and it is monetary that's not paying rent typically your lights go up a little bit more when people stay with you, so it is monetary alright, that's not paying
Speaker 1:oh yeah, essentially I'm not paying rent right now typically your lights go up a little bit more when people stay with you, so it is monetary, so there is some benefits to being able to like for sure giving that way, so it's not always you know. You know people have negative experiences or bad experiences with. You know helping people out financially.
Speaker 3:I helped you out financially, but she's the top of the show. It didn't go. Who helped me out? You With your race, with your what?
Speaker 2:Oh wow, Can you explain? Oh wow, I'm sorry.
Speaker 3:She said an experience.
Speaker 1:That was Cue the sad music.
Speaker 3:Wait, can you elaborate on that?
Speaker 1:So what happened was Can I tell my own story? So I really wanted to be a missionary and travel the world and I was a part of. I was a part of something called the world race and I was supposed to raise X amount of dollars I can't really remember the amount and there were various people that had given to this mission trip.
Speaker 3:Various had given to this mission trip.
Speaker 1:Various people gave to this mission trip, including Shavonna and Kiara.
Speaker 3:Kiara, who I mean? I'm sorry, Nikea.
Speaker 1:And I was unable to go. Where did the money go? Who knows? I don't know. I know that they were given to the organization. How much money did you actually make? I don't know.
Speaker 2:I know that they were given to the organization how much money did you actually make, like how many, I don't know, oh wow she put that in a bad memory it was a trauma, a trauma.
Speaker 1:I was mad at the Lord for an entire summer. Yes, she was because I did not go and I felt like it was something I was called to do. Yes, I might need to go back to therapy over that one.
Speaker 3:I don't have much to say, oh, I brought up the trouble, I'm sorry, take off the sad music. We're moving on but yeah, no, that that was um. It's just like different things, I think yeah I've given to like um. I remember one of my friends, um I gave to. She was um, her and her husband was like doing like a building and I just gave to like it's just different things, or being able to give like gifts, or like massages or like, especially for our friends who like have children and giving them a time to be able to rest.
Speaker 3:Like it's fun to be able to give money and watch, like them being able to just really receive it and receive the benefits from it, so yeah.
Speaker 1:So what tips would you give to people who are trying to like navigate?
Speaker 3:you know, giving money to friends or family members you know what I'm saying and still protecting themselves or protecting their funds so my mama used to always say, like, don't lend out what you need. And I'm I'm bad on that. Oh, me too I used to be bad, like, oh, I will give my last just because somebody like I gotta pay rent or I gotta because it kind of I feel like it conflicts with the scripture, a little bit like if the bible says, like if you summarize if you got like a hat and your or you have a coat and your brother needs a coat, give him the coat right that could be the only coat.
Speaker 1:But the bible says give him your coat. So I do think there's some wisdom don't give out something you need right but then it's just like well. How did that work with scripture?
Speaker 2:because everybody's like sometimes right huh, and that's what she said.
Speaker 3:That is the balance because I think we don't pray about yeah we don't pray about like, should I enable this person or should I just do they really need it? Lord, am I the vessel that you want me, you know, to be used for?
Speaker 2:so that's the difference maker.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, and one thing I say is if I can't give it to you, what's? What's your next option? Like if somebody asks me for something and it's like, if I'm not able to give it to you, what is your option? What are you?
Speaker 3:gonna do right, because it's another option besides me, which is me so especially in those moments where you really ain't got it.
Speaker 1:So it's just like so I can't really help you, but let me know if you really, really, really, really can't and.
Speaker 3:I'll see what I can do, like watch what people do when you're not the person, because some people give you the. I got to do it at like 8 o'clock, so what's going to happen after?
Speaker 2:8? I recently had that experience.
Speaker 3:You said what.
Speaker 2:You said, I recently had that experience. Wait what?
Speaker 3:happened, like it was like an immediate right, like oh, I need it right now. You gonna figure it out. That's what they was gonna do nah, I was. I was the one that still but in your timing though, you did it in your timing. On my timing, you did it in your timing.
Speaker 2:That is hilarious, so I agree with Shay knowing what you can and cannot do, yeah and then also. I mean, I was gonna say the enabling part, but I think just being led by the Holy Ghost, like you never know what season someone is- in Exactly and even the scripture that you mentioned. It even says, like if the person asks you to go one mile, go two miles. So it's just like are you really enabling or are you really depositing seeds?
Speaker 1:you know, Okay, well, you better drop the scripture you got another scripture we need to know about money.
Speaker 2:Actually, you got another scripture we need to know about money. Actually I do, all right, okay. Well, so maybe about because I've always struggled with managing money and I think it comes from just like. It's like a scarcity mindset, just like, oh, I'm going to run out of it. So I got to make more of it and, honestly, I don't know where the money at Like, where is the money? I feel like I've been working, working a whole lot.
Speaker 2:And I, just, I cannot see like I literally cannot see, like the abundance of it and so there was a scripture that God gave me about three, four years ago.
Speaker 2:I clearly have not applied it yet, but it's a scripture in Proverbs 32 and 5. I don't remember exactly, but it says pretty much right, pretty much if you, if your heart is set on getting riches, that the eagles would take it and fly away and take it to the heavens. So I paraphrase it don't quote me, but it says that if your heart is set on money and riches, that the eagles take it and send it to the heavens.
Speaker 2:So is that what they just did no, that's literally what's because you love getting the riches you, you will, you will work to death.
Speaker 3:I'll be like dang, I can't working again this weekend like no, somebody asked me like when I can't, oh, she working right I'm trying to.
Speaker 2:I was trying to work today she was, she was. I'm just trying to work tomorrow I'm like ma'am, woman of god, like so so I think, yeah, you probably need to apply that asap so you can see see your stuff here, not in the heavens so there is a scripture in the bible and it says the love of money is the root to all kinds of evil.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and so like it's really important to that you're not, that you're not loving the money, right yeah, there we go, thank you.
Speaker 1:So how do you think someone you know gets rid of that love for money?
Speaker 2:I'm still working it out, still working it out, but I think that it's being honest with like even what I said earlier, like the scarcity mindset, like targeting whatever the root is like what causes you to overcompensate?
Speaker 3:So why are you doing it?
Speaker 1:Have you discovered why you have the poverty mindset or the scarcity mindset?
Speaker 2:So it definitely comes from the way I was raised. So I feel like there were times when we didn't have the best of things. There were times where I mean we were homeless, so having to overcompensate. That makes sense. Well, well, later on down the line, and so I feel like you don't think you've like healed the little girl?
Speaker 1:did you ever make like vows to yourself? Like you know how people make vows? Like when I become a grown up, I'm never gonna want my kids. Or did you ever like make vows? Like you know, when I get older, I'll never buy off brand food. Or when I get older, I'll never buy off-brand food. Or when I get older, I'll never do blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 2:With the food, yes, not in other areas.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Only with the food. That was as far as money is concerned.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Okay, because I feel like when I get older, I'm going to be like we just be making these vows that could like really be hindering you know us that we're not like fully aware of, but you know what I think sometimes we think if we were to have all the money we would be like happy, like my husband was just bringing up a comedian and he, she, he was like when he died he had like I don't know some amount of millions like in his account. Like you know, like what you can't leave yourself if you have all these millions of account.
Speaker 1:But the truth is, it's like it's not money that makes us happy, which is you know why the scripture says like money is the root to all kinds of evil, like, and. But it also says money answers things. So there's some truth to it being help like we need it. Let's not act like if I didn't get a million dollars right now, there wouldn't be a joy that I could not contain in my soul but it's not the end.
Speaker 1:All be all like. We need you know God more than anything else, and what he provides is much. I mean he could provide the money, but what he gives to our souls is just so much more beneficial, which is important to heal from. You know what you experienced as a kid so that you could fully be alive, so that you can live your life, because there's been plenty of weekends or days where you've missed out on memories and experiences to connect with people who love you because you were chasing a bag. You know nothing wrong with doing it. She's young or in single and able to do certain things, but I do think there has to be a balance so that you don't miss out on life trying to achieve a dollar, that's.
Speaker 3:That's what literally you said. All that coming out of my last work experience, it was like I was missing so much of my family, like because you know Thanksgiving in our mobile world, you know that was a heavy Black Friday, and so I would just miss out. And I'll see the pictures and the videos they'll send me and I'm just like dang, I'm really missing it because I'm chasing a bag, or you know what I mean. It's like, yeah, that's. I don't think. I don't think that's what God intends, yeah.
Speaker 2:Money can't, money can't buy memories you know you can't, so can't.
Speaker 1:That's good. Well, we can pay to go get some memories, but once they're gone, they're gone, they're.
Speaker 2:Even in that season of life where I was, I feel like I've exercised more balance-ish Gotcha.
Speaker 3:But I remember growing, growing. So, I remember in seasons like where I would be so immersed.
Speaker 1:I would immerse myself in school and I would immerse myself in oh, me too, I hated it.
Speaker 3:I hated it. I hated school when I was a kid.
Speaker 1:I hated it it got on my nerves Like nigga. Do you even love us?
Speaker 3:Like it got on my nerves like nigga do you even love us.
Speaker 1:Like I get it. School is not that hard, though I apologize. Thank you, I apologize. I'm growing right, you are, you are. So you remember that season um of school. Like what was going through your mind then, like you know, it was just like all I care about is school.
Speaker 2:I mean uh I mean I had to graduate.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And I had to get that money and I'm so bad. She wanted the money. Why am I this way?
Speaker 1:I honestly wonder what you would look like if you were to truly get healed from that, Like if God was to truly heal you from the fear of not having enough, the fear of not being secure financially. Like what your life would look like. What would you do? Where would you travel?
Speaker 3:What things would you explore if you were truly to your frequent? Yeah, because I think you are really a little bit scarred. I'm not even gonna lie. Yeah, because you literally I think she even said it one time like she's just scared of not having enough and it's like girl, you got enough you got enough, and even if you were to lose what you had, god is the god that can replenish it, he can jobe has it all in control.
Speaker 1:Your ability to walk and get up is because of him, so if he wanted you to have more or less money, he can make that happen. So what I'm not about to do is miss out on no trip, right, I ain't missing that.
Speaker 3:That's that New York trip. I wasn't about to miss out because I just lost my job. We had to convince you yeah See that's why you got to have money, Because sometimes let's talk about that. That's the flip side.
Speaker 1:So the other side is that you are literally in need and you're in friend groups with people who can help you and you're sitting there struggling because you have too much pride, shavonna. Oh, that pride got me Too much pride to say I need help. Ma'am, the trip is already paid for you, remember, I remember.
Speaker 3:I remember me, though. Remember that's when I first first lost my job. So I think what scared them was I had my like lights off and we was facetiming, and I think that's what made y'all no, you were definitely depressed even the lights didn't make a difference.
Speaker 1:You were giving it was in your talk in the way you like were receiving things like you was just out of it, you were not sure. Well, yeah, so.
Speaker 3:I remember, um, I was like, yeah, I'm not going on the trip, whatever. And it was like, no, we're gonna give you the because I I think I was trying to pay my car payment or something, or something like that. Yeah, and I can't say, it was like, well, we'll give you the 200 and then we'll give you.
Speaker 3:I was like, oh, they're some real friends I was just laying but um, but it was just cool to see that like they cared enough about my health, um like somebody might have lost their job and they might need the trip yeah, to kind of really get through and have some joy, so they don't take themselves out and we gotta just drop a couple hundred right, right, right, and they, they did, and they did, and it
Speaker 2:was yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3:So it was. It was a fun trip and everything. So yeah, that was. It was much needed, especially in that season.
Speaker 1:So heal people, heal.
Speaker 2:Yes, learn from me, learn from me.
Speaker 1:Use boundaries and use the Holy Spirit to lead you into. You know how to make the best financial decisions, if you should help somebody or not. Really deal with the spirit of poverty in your life and then really just allow God to just come in and just heal what you went through as a kid, because our childhood literally just be setting the ground for how we feel, what we think and how we move in our adulthood and especially in our 30s.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and that's what my mom always, me and my brothers always play about this my especially in our 30s. Yeah, and that's what my mom always, me and my brothers always play about this. My mom always say don't live in Lodabar. So I always say don't live in Lodabar and don't live below the bar. I like that, that's good. So, yeah, that's good.
Speaker 2:But yeah, so Say it again for the people in the back.
Speaker 3:So below the bar, so that's good, yep, all right.
Speaker 3:So this segment is called friendship stories all right so I'm gonna read a story and you're gonna tell me do they need to get out the group chat or stay in the group chat? My friend got angry because I didn't loan him money fast enough. I've been without money before so I understood I was in a situation I could pass the favor on. I said I'd help him out in a few hours when I was free. He got angry. What y'all think? Leave the group. Stay in the group.
Speaker 2:Nah, don't leave the group.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know if I would say leave the group, but I definitely would say have a conversation. Okay, have a conversation. So like, why are you upset and maybe you'll find out? I'm upset because the people just caught, or I just found out. If I don't pay my light bill in three hours, it's literally going to get cut off and then maybe there's an extra fee. Or if I don't pay my rent cause I waited too long, cause I thought I could figure it out, if thought I could figure it out, if I don't get it done in this time, then it's just really over for me and I'm owe 300 more dollars. You know what I'm saying. So that could be a potential. So that's why I say I would have a conversation, because you don't know exactly why they're angry. Now, the truth is, there could be the side we all thinking like you just upset, I didn't do what you wanted me to do when you wanted me to do it. Remember your situation. Yeah, I had a very very similar situation.
Speaker 2:So I think it's important for the individual that's requesting the money. Like you don't know what the other person is doing. They can be at work, they can be a doctor and operating on a patient. You know what I mean. Like you just never know, like what's on the other side of the person's life.
Speaker 3:Like what they're doing, what they're occupied with.
Speaker 2:But I do get the urgency, like my life's about to be cut off, but you should have said it earlier you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Like you should have explained that like, hey, I need five hundred dollars and you upset because I need to find it.
Speaker 2:I was finding out for what can you list out what is going on so I can assess the situation.
Speaker 1:So, even if I am at work and I see the emergency. I mean it. But if you just ask me some money track, look at it later.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that's true yeah, I will put conversation. Yeah. So if you're out there, put the reasoning like hey, I need $300 right now, in the next three hours, or they're going to add an extra $300. So then I'm going to need $600 for you. That's going to make the move a little bit quicker. You know what I mean. But just saying I need $300 and going about your business, that ain't going to help, yeah, specify the need, right, yeah.
Speaker 1:So people know what they need to do Right and have grace if they in the operating room Exactly, cause you don't know what.
Speaker 3:Or they just had a car accident, or they're depressed, right.
Speaker 1:Or you know they're not even alive. Have you ever considered that? I was thinking about that, like when you be straight out here mad at people who not responding to you.
Speaker 3:you have no idea what's going to happen to them?
Speaker 1:No, and then it's specifically a text message about you asking for some money you don't know what's going on with me so give grace. Give grace to the friend that's angry. Give grace, you know, to the other person as well. Yeah, that's good.
Speaker 3:Well, that's a wrap on monies and homies, nikea thank you so much for joining us today give the people your socials.
Speaker 1:Do you want them to follow you?
Speaker 2:sure, okay, it's, do it like nike.
Speaker 1:It's an underscore and somewhere do it, do it like somewhere in there, but you'll find me.
Speaker 2:You know it's a beautiful face. Okay, beautiful face yeah, follow me.
Speaker 1:Awesome. Well, thank you. We appreciate you for coming to season two of get out of the group chat. You're amazing.
Speaker 2:We love you and we're praying for you always.
Speaker 3:Thank you, praying for you guys too, and don't forget guys to like, subscribe and comment share with about 10 people, uh, so they can have their monies and homies, correct yes, and we say this every time if you want to be a part of our close friends like you want to be close friends with us for real, for real right go ahead and dm us on instagram at black friends forever and say, hey, I want to be a part of your close friends and we will add you to the group.
Speaker 1:Honey, you get all the tea on what we're doing, all of our hangouts, that's what we're putting in, that we're putting in our close friends stores, so you won't see it in the regular stores. You gotta be a part of our close friends to really know what we're up to.
Speaker 3:Yes, all right, and don't forget we're going to do Shout your Bestie Out. Shout your Bestie Out, where we'll you know whatever you want, whoever the name is, we're going to do a little video, cute little video, for you and your bestie. So yeah, that's just what it is. Shout your Bestie Out, We'll put it in our stories or on social media. So yeah, Shout your Bestie Out.
Speaker 2:Shout your Bestie Out Shout.
Speaker 1:Your Bestie Out. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, y'all, we love y'all. We can't wait to see you guys next time. Peace and chicken grease.
Speaker 3:Get out the group chat.